breaking up is just so hard to do...

"Grace, paano ba makipagbreak?"

I almost fell down the moment I read this text message on my cellphone, knowing that the message was from someone special who just recently had entered his so-called "eto na ito" relationship.

I replied by saying,
"Ewan ko. Maghanap ka ng iba. Wag ka magpakita ng isang buwan. di ba kabisado mo na dapat yan."

I gave an answer that I did not even bother to think about first or never at all. I do not think I am in the right position to answer such query. For I only had two relationships in my life. So my experience of break-ups is somehow still lacking, although I had my major roles in both break-ups. I had both played the heart breaker and the heartbroken. In my first relationship I admit I am the heart breaker. I broke a man's heart by falling for someone else, I broke it further when I entered a whirlwind romance (whirlwind indeed for it lasted shortly). I am the heart broken in the second relationship. I did not initiate the break-up process but I initiated the events that lead to it and in the end I was the one who was left behind.

I try not to put myself in the character of a heartbroken as the weakest in the relationship. I did cry, felt helpless and hopeless for sometime. But it depends whether one considers himself as the the broken or the breaker. A positive perspective would make someone look at himself in the failed relationship as someone who lost or gained something. I lost the relationship but I gained life. A new, stronger and wiser one.

So the two reasonable ways to break-up that I advised that someone were drawn from my subconsciousness. Because those two reasons were basically what happened to me. I just had different perspectives on both break-ups.

For someone who's had many relationships before and who happens to be my senior, I do not think he should have asked me that question. But I guess he thought my answer would give him a different perspective or maybe I had a different way of breaking it up. The truth is, I do. I had my own ways on how to break a relationship. I just hope that I will never have to do it again. Because breaking up is just so hard to do.