writing blogs

I am not a good writer but I do love to write. Whenever I felt like doing so, I write whatever is on my mind. I have so many thoughts to share but time has been elusive as it always has.

I did not attend any formal classes on writing except for the communication subjects I had in High School and College but they were all academic-based. I hated writing essays in class because the pen, the paper and the time hinders me from expressing myself completely. If I had to write, I do it on my computer in my own little space at my own time.

Good writers have these so-called rituals before they get to start writing. They even develop habits that without them, they can never produce a good article. There are those who are can only write in the silence of their room, some can write out in the open, noisy street and there are those who write only at more specific and unbelievable places.

People get inspiration from nature, from emotional turmoil or just out of the blue. Even philosophers, statesmen and scientists get inspiration from somewhere one way or another. Famous thinkers have mysterious rituals before they can start working. Writers are no different. Bloggers,on the other hand only need a computer and an internet connection just to get started.

Blogging has been the trend nowadays especially among the younger crowd, with the majority of those who write and maintain blogs did not get formal training on writing. Blogging as they say is the future of writing. One does not need a proofreader or an editor so that he can publish his thoughts to a number of people. Publishing on the World Wide Web has become easier because of the networking sites and blog sites that encourage people to express themselves freely. The aesthetics of writing are now confined on school or academic papers, journals and newspapers.

It is good to know that people can now express themselves to the billions of people around the world through the internet. Although I must admit sometimes it has gone too far. People are now encouraged to write and share their thoughts to the rest of the world, luckily I belong to that crowd.

Because of the invention of blogs, I can now call myself a writer and so are you.

Running Acad Oval part 1

It's been a while since I last jogged around the campus. It felt good since for the past months, I had spent my weight loss activities in the confines of a gym. Going outside for a workout was refreshing and it felt different. I found it difficult to run the mile knowing that at the end of each round, you are not there to greet me. I am used to jogging while you were conducting your general assembly meetings or spending quality time with your brothers. I am drowned in my own thoughts as I ran and you are trying to solve the issues as you sit down drowned in your own politics.
At the end of my rounds, we drown ourselves in our little world.

I miss running while you were biking at my side or you, just waiting at your usual spot in the kiosk. I miss the laughter we share at the end of my run (I think I burn more calories when you make me laugh). And when we have plenty to spend, our food trip at the Chocolate Kiss while I'm still in my workout clothes drenched in sweat while the people around us were either in their formal or "dining out" clothes.

This was actually the first time I ran while you are miles away lighting a play I will never see. I did burn calories but not as much as I will when we are together...

Special Olympics 1

Im so happy today for I learned a lot in the Special Olympics. I learned a lot from a nun who devoted her life reaching out to disadvantaged children with special needs (CSN) and to a college professor who committed his life to helping CSN. One day, I will use my knowledge in health to reach out to these children and hopefully to the other members of the society.

I just pray that my Lighting Director would guide me all the way.

Liham para kay Crushee

Alam mo bang crush na crush kita sa tuwing nag-uusap tayo ng mga makabuluhang bagay na may kinalaman sa lipunan? Sa bawat teorya at konsepto na binibitawan mo, buong lakas akong nakikinig sa matamis mong boses na puno ng galak. Buong hanga akong nakikinig sa mga siyentipikong katotohanan na binabahagi mo. Binibigyan mo ng linaw ang mga bagay na hirap akong unawain, binabato mo ng sagot ang mga tanong kong nakalutang sa hangin. At parang isang dalubhasa, tinutulungan mo akong hanapin ang mga sagot sa ilalim ng mga bituwin. Patawad dahil kahit ilang beses mo ituro at ibahagi sa akin ang agham ng pag-ibig, bobo pa rin ako.

Alam mo bang masaya ako kapag pinipinta mo sa aking isipan ang kasaysayan ng mundo? Nabubuhay sa harap ko ang lahat sa paghibla mo ng nakaraan at nang kasalukuyan. Iginuguhit mo sa aking mga mata ang mga katotohanang itinago sa akin ng gobyerno, ginuguhit mo ang mga kaganapan sa kasaysayan na hindi isinulat sa libro.

Alam mo bang hinahangaan kita sa tuwing ipinapakita mo sa akin ang sining ng mundo? Parati kang may ibabahaging kaalaman sa bawat dula na itinanghal sa entablado. Natutunan ko na ring mahalin ang teatro dahil bukas-loob mo akong sinama sa mundong iyon.

Alam mo bang minsan ay kinakabahan ako kapag nag-uusap na tayo ng mga konsepto ng agham panlipunan at gobyerno? Dahil nakikita ko at nararamdaman ang nangyayari sa lipunang kinabibilangan natin. Dahil anumang oras maaari tayong madakip hindi dahil sa subersibo nating pananaw kundi marami tayong nabasa at nakitang artikulong ipinagbabawal.

Alam mo bang namamangha ako sa iyo sa tuwing may ibinabahagi kang kaalaman na wala sa mga libro sa library at sa bookstore? Magaling ka manaliksik at tumuklas ng mga bagay. Marunong kang maghanap ng literatura at impormasyong may kinalaman sa buhay at sa mundo.

Alam mo bang pangarap ko na sana ang magiging anak ko ay katulad mo? Na sana ituturo mo rin sa kanya ang mga bagay na binahagi mo sa akin. Na sa pagdating ng panahon, ikaw ang maging guro niya at sabay kayong tutuklas ng mga misteryo sa mundong ibabaw.

Sana ay di ka magsawang makipagdebate sa akin. Sana ay hindi ka mapagod sa mga diskusyon natin, na kahit bawal na tayo sa kape o sa matatamis ay patuloy pa rin tayong mag-"intellectual intercourse."

Sana malaman mo...

breaking up is just so hard to do...

"Grace, paano ba makipagbreak?"

I almost fell down the moment I read this text message on my cellphone, knowing that the message was from someone special who just recently had entered his so-called "eto na ito" relationship.

I replied by saying,
"Ewan ko. Maghanap ka ng iba. Wag ka magpakita ng isang buwan. di ba kabisado mo na dapat yan."

I gave an answer that I did not even bother to think about first or never at all. I do not think I am in the right position to answer such query. For I only had two relationships in my life. So my experience of break-ups is somehow still lacking, although I had my major roles in both break-ups. I had both played the heart breaker and the heartbroken. In my first relationship I admit I am the heart breaker. I broke a man's heart by falling for someone else, I broke it further when I entered a whirlwind romance (whirlwind indeed for it lasted shortly). I am the heart broken in the second relationship. I did not initiate the break-up process but I initiated the events that lead to it and in the end I was the one who was left behind.

I try not to put myself in the character of a heartbroken as the weakest in the relationship. I did cry, felt helpless and hopeless for sometime. But it depends whether one considers himself as the the broken or the breaker. A positive perspective would make someone look at himself in the failed relationship as someone who lost or gained something. I lost the relationship but I gained life. A new, stronger and wiser one.

So the two reasonable ways to break-up that I advised that someone were drawn from my subconsciousness. Because those two reasons were basically what happened to me. I just had different perspectives on both break-ups.

For someone who's had many relationships before and who happens to be my senior, I do not think he should have asked me that question. But I guess he thought my answer would give him a different perspective or maybe I had a different way of breaking it up. The truth is, I do. I had my own ways on how to break a relationship. I just hope that I will never have to do it again. Because breaking up is just so hard to do.

Full Moon

Every time I am out on the streets I always looked up in the sky, always looking for than tiny white thing. I am fascinated by its beauty, its glamor and prowess in the midst of an infinite space. Despite its solitude and distance from other heavenly bodies, it never fails to bring people together. Making them look up and dream for a prosperous day ahead. I have yet to see what the moon will bring to my future, but I am sure it will give me something beautiful tonight.

A few nights in a month the moon becomes full. On such occasions, I am nostalgic. It is not every night do we see the moon at its finest. Those are the nights when the space above is full - of stars, the moon and sky. Nature is complete when the moon shows its face, uninhibited and full of strength. The moon changes the color of its glow depending on the solar system's movement and surprisingly, the mood among its viewers changes too.

Many gather strength from the moon; there are others who become alive the moment the moon fills up the empty sky and there are those who start their lives upon the striking of the moon in the evening sky. Up there in all its glory, it shines on the earth with a mixture of a fearful and endearing glow. Its light reflects on the deep blue sea, uniting the air and water.

For the scientists it is just another body in the cosmos, an omen to the mystics, a romantic gesture to the hopeless lover, a clock to the magician and a guiding light to the nocturnal hunter. I do not know what I shall call the moon; I have nothing special for it other than a creation to admire every night and something to share with a loved one.

May the moon be anything but death for when it comes, the earth will just be a once-in-a-blue-moon event that transcended space.

mary

Before the year ended, we shared a night like no other. We were in a dark room yet the light you emitted was enough to show me who you really are. Your outline, the touch of your skin and your scent drove me crazy. It was an exciting night knowing that after many years of my existence, I would finally meet you face-to-face. There was only a brief introduction because we felt like we have known each other for a long time. I know you from the books, the media, the government and the adventurers but I have yet to know the real you. You know all about me, my need to escape, my desire to experience and my angst. You said you will give me your services for free as long as I do not fall in love with you head over heels. We will hook up as agreed; no obligations, no regrets and free of charge.

I ran my fingers against your body. I shivered at the thought that finally we will be one. You touched me in places like no one else can and we breathed the same cold air. In the silence of the night you sang with Ivy,

Bye Bye baby, don’t be long
I’ll worry about you while you’re gone…

All my worries got lost in space the moment you kissed me. Time stopped and there was no turning back. It is now or never. All that I was taught about you were forgotten the instant you penetrated me. Yes, we were finally one. You went inside me and took my soul away; with it were the truths I strongly believed in. I did not fight back instead I gave it all. You wrapped me in your arms and I felt your warmth inside me. You warmed my cold heart and it suddenly pumped back to life.

My resurrected heart worked faster than ever, I do not know if it was the thrill of the moment or your presence that made it race like hell. All I know is that you made me be someone that the society thinks is not capable of committing a crime much more go out with you. You created a reality for me, a reality free from oppression, from love, from myself and free from truths.
You gave us a reality very different from mine, although at the back of my mind I know it will not last. It never will.

You took my breath away but still I gasped that you do not stop. It was a perfect bliss. You were all over me; passionately burning and clouding the space around us. Your spirit sustained me until your fire died.

The people are against us. They want you away from this world where you can no longer hurt people. Every minute was a struggle with the thought that what was happening is a sin, a crime against society. If they find us together, we could both be dead.

What they said were true. You were classy that Dunhill, better than Winston by tenfold and stronger than what the Fortune teller foretold. You were better than a man for you brought me effortlessly to heaven. We flew to never land. That night you were mine and I am yours, my Mary.

It does not matter what the others call you. Your former lovers may call you a thousand endearing names but you are my opium and my only one night stand.

I am sorry I broke the rules. I fell in love with you. When shall I see you again? I want to hear your sweet promises; I need to feel you again. When will you cloud the room that we once shared? I looked for you in the Fair grounds but did not feel your presence. When years before, we always had brief encounters in the midst of the University grounds. I have not forgotten about you and I never will. I am worried while you are gone. I cannot wait to create a new and different reality with you, even if it is short-lived.

I am singing you this while waiting for your return.

…Baby, don’t be long
I’ll worry about you while you’re gone…
I’ll think of you in my dreams,
You never know just what you mean to me.